Series: Love Glue
Message: Glue Stick: Apply With Care
Preacher: Japhet De Oliveira
Reflection: Mike Speegle
Live Wonder: Zan Long
Live Adventure: Zan Long
Live Beyond: Brandon Kharns
Live Purpose: Vanessa Rivera
Editor: Becky De Oliveira
Refresh: Begin with prayer. Ask for the Holy Spirit to open your heart to new understanding and for God’s character to be revealed.
Read: Ephesians 5:21-33 in the New Testament for Everyone (NTE). Note 1–3 insights or questions.
Reflect: If you aren’t a wife or husband, you haven’t done the Daily Walk the past two days (I’m trusting that you follow directions).
When the people in the first century read the passage we’re looking at this week, they all thought “of course” when it came to wives “submitting” to their husbands.
That concept wasn’t new; there was no surprise that Paul would write something like that, and no one was offended because in that culture women, like kids, were possessions, commodities (there are times when our culture still sadly treats them that way). Submitting to men is what smart women did.
Actually it was the men, the husbands, who were caught off guard when Paul wrote that they were to love (agape) their wives just like Jesus had loved the church and given His life for it.
That was unheard of in that culture. That’s important for us to know because we find ourselves having the opposite reactions in our culture. Wives are upset about submitting, and husbands are like, “Of course I’m supposed to love my wife.”
There is an interesting grammatical thing that Paul does in this passage. Verse 22 literally reads, “Wives, to your own husbands as to the Lord.” Why is there no verb? Because it came in the verse before (Verse 21): “Be subject to one another out of reverence for the Messiah.”
Paul uses this grammatical tool so we won’t miss the point: our submission goes back to Jesus and our phobos, our fear, terror, dread for Jesus.
In other words, the submitting is based on all that Jesus has done for us. And this concept, if we could somehow grasp it, is the key to making relationships work: “I’m here for you because God was here for me, so I’m here for you.”
Paul’s point is this: Jesus is the reason we do what we do. It’s always about Jesus and how we relate, respond, and reorder our lives to Him.
Recalibrate: Does my life give evidence of my reverence of Jesus? How, on a macro and micro level, is my life and relationships different today because of that reverence?
Respond: Where and how do I need to reorder my life toward Jesus in my relationships?
Research: Take a moment and listen to Lauren Daigle’s rendition of Turn your Eyes Upon Jesus.
Remember: “Be willing to obey each other. Do this because you respect Christ” (Ephesians 5:21, ICB).
Mike Speegle is the lead pastor for New Hope, an exciting, young, multi-ethnic Adventist Church in Fulton, Maryland. Mike became a follower of Jesus and an Adventist in his early 20s. Pacific Union College was the first Adventist school he ever attended; he met his wife Lorie there. Mike has pastored for 30+ years, served in the Ministerial Association of the General Conference, and has written a book, Big Questions, as well as a number of articles.
Using an umbrella, go out in the rain (or snow) today. It may not be raining or snowing in your part of the world, so find a hose or a spray bottle full of water and make it rain. Let your little one discover how the umbrella protects them from getting wet if they choose to stay underneath it. God’s grace is the biggest umbrella and there is room under there for everyone.
It’s very hot here in Australia. It’s summertime and anytime we go outside, the thing to do is slip slop slap. This means slip on a shirt, slop on some sunscreen, and slap on a hat to protect yourself from some very bad sunburn. Maybe it’s cold where you live, so you may be putting on a coat and some gloves and a hat to keep yourself from freezing. We cover ourselves so we don’t get hurt. God’s love for us covers us like an umbrella on a rainy day. There is enough room under God’s umbrella for everyone. Imagine that.
So yesterday, I talked mostly to the ladies about respecting the man you are with. Well, this next text really isn’t talked about as often as it should be. And the last text should never be talked about without this one. Here it goes: “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.” Guys, before you get too excited about being “the head of the wife,” don’t forget the second half—you know, the part about doing it just like Christ is the head of the church.
Hey guys, let’s talk about that whole “Christ being the head of the church” bit. The girls can listen in if they want to. Remember how Jesus acted with His disciples? He acted like a servant with them. He washed His disciples’ feet like a common servant. Then after that, He sacrificed Himself for them. He was publicly humiliated, beaten, tortured, then suffered one of the most horrific deaths ever. He was the perfect example of putting everyone else first. Probably not exactly what you had in mind when you you were thinking about being in charge. You want to be the husband or boyfriend that God wants you to be? Want to have the girl that God wants you to have? Learn to put her first and serve her like Jesus served His disciples. Ladies, want a worthwhile guy? This is how you find him.
When I was in high school, my father would not take me to school until three things were done. I had to make my bed, eat breakfast, and have family worship. My dad would not waver on these things. You would think the parent would be trying to get us to school earlier, but alas, he wanted us to learn responsibility. His plan totally worked. And even though sometimes my sisters and I would sit through family worship with school on our minds and not be focused on our devotional that morning, just doing it made a difference. We started the day asking Jesus to be part of it. We aren’t a perfect family but I know this discipline set a spiritual foundation for all of us. Jesus being the center of a family or any relationship will make it different for the better. Think of a relationship you have with someone. How can you put Jesus in the center?
Zan Long is GRC director for faith development groups. She lives in Sydney, Australia, and serves at her local church in nearby Kellyville.
Brandon Kharns is the family life pastor at Placerville Seventh-day Adventist church in the Sierra Nevada foothills of California near Lake Tahoe.
Vanessa Rivera is a therapist in a community mental health center in Denver, CO, and serves as the lead elder for Live Purpose at Boulder Church.